Schooling the Flying Changes

TC had Monday off after the show, just a hand walk and he got to roll in his favorite spot: the trail course. I remain mildly terrified that he's going to go down while I'm on him out there (because he's a giant pony), but so far he hasn't.

I made the executive decision during my ride on Tuesday to start back with the changes. I've been thinking about when to put them on and I just fucking want them on early this winter. I figure that now is a good time because I know he's going to anticipate and buck a lot, so I'd rather do that now when the weather is okay vs waiting until the spring when it will affect my show season.

And I don't want another show season where I'm delayed. By the time spring hits, he'll theoretically have them on and be ready to be told to do them only when I ask. I usually give it six months of not saying no to change offerings. Six months from now is about when I'd start showing again.

He's not as strong as I'd like him to be just yet, but he is getting
there slowly but surely! 

We warmed up in trot and I'm noticing more and more that he wants to peel off the left rein. So much that while tracking right, he wants to duck in and track left instead. I'm not sure if he's always been like this and I'm just slowly recognizing it, or if this is new.

The trot felt good though, and we did some walk-trot and trot-walk transitions to work on him staying up and in front of my leg during them.

From there, I picked up the canter to warm up, which felt good, and then we started on the changes.

He's so cute, I don't hate the bonnet either

TC has schooled changes on and off. I wanted to make sure that as a young horse, he knew that changing was a thing he'd have to do. So he's familiar with the concept.

I set us up on the diagonal so that I could see in the mirror whether he was clean or not. We schooled them more than we have ever schooled them and he got more and more confident. With confidence came anticipation, because what is more fun than being ALLOWED to jump into the air when you've been told not to do that for a long time. So he started to want to run sideways and with that came some hollow and croup high moments.

My idea is to just put them on how they're going to be put on (obviously I'll put them on clean, I just mean that it's okay if he gets a bit crooked or croup high), then fix them later. When he knows what he's supposed to do, changing how he does them is easy with the clicker. Again what is crucial at this point is to get them on clean.

My left hand is being it's normal annoying self, but he's cute at
least! 

And he did have mostly clean changes! His tendency is to get his haunches left and his shoulder right, so in the LR change, he wants to get late behind and the RL change he wants to get late in front, but for the most part, they were at the same time. I don't mind something late in front because my timing is good enough to fix that right up, but the late behind isn't cool. With more straightness and collection will come better and better changes.

Generally I'm pretty pleased with them at this point, I think he just needs miles and to get less excited about doing them. I figure we'll school them at least once a week for a while to see if we can clean them up before I have to admit to Tracey what I've been doing. That's honestly the hardest part about putting movements on horses for me!

WW: Boing

From the show last weekend, woops. This was not from the big bucks, it was from him being annoyed he had to collect his canter so much after the big bucks. Sorry pony.

Thanks, TC (also note how I stay on him: skewering him with
my spurs, sorry bud) 

Mostly thanks for that giant neck

Also for not bucking again

Amidst a Windstorm

On Saturday afternoon, I had a mild mental break down! Yay! Essentially I've just been pushing and pushing, as per usual, and I hit a wall. So you know, that was cool.

Sunday morning, I woke up at 5am and was pulling into the barn at 5:40. I had just enough time to braid and pack before loading TC and heading up to our very first (and last) show of the year, where we'd be making our (rated) Second level debut, finally.

I mean, aside from the mental breakdown on Saturday, things began to go wrong when I got to the barn and discovered that, because PG&E is a SHIT company and instead of fixing their shit so they stop causing the state of California to burn to death every year, they have opted instead to just cut power randomly to hundreds of thousands of residents. I am not one of them, at least at my home, but the barn was. Great. So I quickly loaded TC in the dark at 5:50 and we were on our way to the show.

Love that uphill balance and split behind, and this is his weak
lead right now!

As we were driving to the show, a windstorm hit us. I felt it shake my trailer with my very wind-averse horse in it. Cool, cool.

We got to the show and I've never experienced a windstorm like this. Everything was blowing sideways and literal branches of trees were on the ground blowing around. I unloaded and began braiding.

It was frigid cold and TC was beginning to freak out due to wind, so I went inside toward the arena and set him up ground tying near a mounting block. He calmed right down and relaxed a bit, so I felt less like a terrible horse owner. I shoved braids into his mane and then went back and got dressed, listening to him scream and pace and generally freak out by the trailer. I got him tacked up and took him inside to warm up.

Warm up started out okay, we trotted around and he was tense but handling it okay. Then he relaxed. Then he bucked so hard that I nearly came off. I got flung to the left and hooked my right spur on him, he bucked due to that so I went to fall right and hung my left spur on him, he bucked again and I managed to sit up. I yelled at him while he was making a good effort to buck me off "YOU ARE NOT BUCKING ME OFF FOR THE FIRST TIME AT A SHOW" because your logical brain is just OUT the window in that situation.

A bit leany but such a good pony

When I got done being nearly launched, I turned to see several people who had jumped up to come catch my loose horse and pick me up, as well as all the riders halting their horses looking horrified. All is well, people, continue your warm up, I'm sorry for the disruption. I got offered a longe line but I'm too much of a stubborn idiot to take anyone up on that. Why am I like this?

I continued my warm up and we just cantered for days. He settled a bit, but was still very tense, we did not really have a walk... Soon I was told I could head over.

I figured I'd just go see how he was, maybe he would be fine in the wind.

He was vehemently not fine, he was better than I thought, but he did keep bolting and bucking in the small warm up arena next to the show ring. I actually said the words "I need to scratch" but then kept going.

Oh hey, it's me, not scratching. Look at all those damn leaves!

Soon it was our turn and he had a good 3 minutes of not bolting or bucking, so I decided to be stupid go in. I warned the judge that I was probably going to trot around and then withdraw. I just wanted to get him around the show ring. Then he took a deep breath and tuned right in. Like he saw the court and the judge and the crowd (I think people came to watch me die from warm up) and he was like OH YES PROFESSIONAL SHOW HORSE COMING THROUGH.

We went down centerline and I felt him surge coming in, he was so excited to be back in the ring. We halted for a 7 and then went in for our first medium. I felt him want to GO and so I held him back and we got another 7 with the comment "little out behind" which like, yep, gotta fix that shit, but the tension wasn't helping either. Our transitions earned a 6 because I was so slow to start, unsure of whether he'd go to launch me or not.

The shoulder-in pattern rode well, except he got wiggly about a GIANT FUCKING BRANCH (okay not that giant but still, a legit branch) on the track, so we got a 6.5 for the first shoulder-in, solid 7 for the second. Our rein back wasn't great, again tension meant that he didn't keep his hind legs as far under him, so we got a 6.5 on that. Then a 7 on medium walk and 6 on free walk (uh, not letting go of the reins, kay?).

Not certain about this decision of mine

The canter started terribly with a 4.5 as he stuttered into it, threatened to bolt, then lost his lead behind and had to pick it up again. After that bullshit, I wasn't going to let him go in a medium so we got a 5 with "unclear"

BUT then we got a pair of 8s for our circle and counter canter and a couple of 7s for our transitions after that. The medium canter the other way also started out with him considering taking off with me, so we got a 6 saying "show more difference" yes judge, yes.

We got another 8 on the next circle "good balance" yay but then a 6.5 on the counter canter on the left lead because he got crooked, mostly because I felt him want to change so I swept his haunches a bit. Another 4 on our right lead canter depart because AGAIN he went to bolt through it but I stopped him "disobedient"

Then we ended the test (!!! we finished!) with 6.5s on our medium and transitions and a 7 on centerline.

Turn off centerline, all our trot pictures were very tense, that's
the gait he shows the most tension unfortunately

Collectives were a 7 on gaits (so respectable given how he was that day AND moving up a level), a 6.5 on impulsion (I bet suppleness of the back and engagement is a big deal there), a 6 on submission with (attention and confidence, as well as acceptance of aids, circled), and I got 7s on both rider position and rider effectiveness.

Comments said that he was a lovely horse who was a bit distracted, but that we were a good pair who works together nicely.

It's blurry but I was so glad to get through
the test that I gave him a hug, he is skeptical

I walked out and decided to scratch the 2-3 if my score was at all low, then decided that I just fucking DIDN'T WANT TO SHOW IN THE FUCKING WIND so decided to scratch anyway. There's no way we'd have walk pirouettes in there and those were supposed to carry the sometimes questionable counter canter pattern in that test for us. Not worth it.

I went to collect my score, a 65.81%, totally respectable for our very first time out at this level! I'm bummed that it was such a stressful day (and weekend) but so glad that he held it together despite being so nervous. I really think he loves showing and that the show ring itself helped him calm down and get focused. And I'm glad I made the decision to scratch the 2-3.

And that's a wrap! Easiest show year ever, just one show, one test, one... insane windstorm. Hopefully next year is a bit better, I think we're on our way to being able to kill it at Second level. Woohoo!

L Program: Formulating Comments

I think one of the hardest things for me so far with judging is formulating comments. In the program, we've been told what not to do quite a bit, so when I come up with something, I know immediately that it's wrong with what I said and there's a ton of hesitation on my part. It's just something that's going to take time. Watching tests and pausing them on youtube is helping me a lot!

So dappled right now! I hope we get another
year of dapples before he gets too light

Here's what I'm dealing with. Guidelines say that comments should...

- be concise (aka don't make your scribe hate you)

- address the basics first (any rhythm problems? no, what about suppleness or balance problems? connection problems? straightness problems?)

- then address criteria of the movement (shoulder-in actually a leg yield? geometry is off?)

- then any modifiers (spooking? tripping?)

- not cause any problematic riding ("rounder" might make the rider pull, instead say "must stretch to contact" same thing with "more bend" vs "horse must yield to inside leg")

- match the score ("great cadence, 5" is not good, neither is "rhythm unclear, 9")

My coworker brought her puppy into work with her and now
she's my puppy 

All of that sounds fine, if you're allowed to ask the rider to wait a second. And you're not.

So in my brain is reeling like "okay rhythm is good, suppleness needs work, maybe that's why the horse is lacking balance? wait what size is this damn circle woman! also where are those haunches flinging around to, okay focus, suppleness is the problem, but also she's pulling hard on the inside rein, how do I make her increase suppleness without making her pull on him more?"

It's freaking difficult! What I'm finding is that I have certain priorities that I need to get in line. I tend to see connection problems first and when I'm live/too close to the horse, I tend to ignore both geometry and hind legs staying close together.

So far, with each movement, this is the list I'm going through. I think for now, I'm going to watch a movement, pause, then go through this list:

1) How is the rhythm? Are the steps clear? What do I think of the quality of the gait? Do I think the rider is helping the horse or is there something the rider is doing that is hindering the gait? Is the tempo too fast where it's disrupting the rhythm? Is a lack of energy causing the horse to be earthbound and therefore ruining the gait?

2) How is the suppleness and balance? Is the horse bending properly? Are they laterally and longitudinally balanced? Is there something that the rider is doing or not doing that is affecting this?

3) How is the connection? Is the horse stretching evenly to both reins? Is the rider allowing for that? Is the horse on the contact in a way that suggests correct training? Is the neck long and the horse's weight shifted back according to the level?

4) How is the impulsion (in impulsion-containing movements)? Does the horse show enough of a moment of suspension (also included in rhythm)?

5) How is the straightness? Is the horse aligned properly on the figure? Does the horse push evenly with both hind legs? Do the haunches track properly behind the shoulders? Does the outside front leg adduct to the midline?

6) What are the criteria for the movement the rider is performing? Are there geometry mistakes? Is the rider capturing the essence of the movement? Do the quality of the gaits and rhythm remain in the movement itself? Does the rider prevent the horse from performing the movement correctly?

7) In the secondary parts of the movement (prior to and directly after the movement, corners, etc), are there any issues? Does the horse lose balance in the corner? Does the rider pull the horse into or out of the movement? Does the horse bobble in the transitions between the movements?

8) Are there any modifiers? Did the horse spook at something or trip? Did the rider lose their stirrup, drop their rein, sneeze, etc?

Then at the same time, we're supposed to be coming up with collectives, gah!

I think the biggest thing for me right now is speeding up how quickly I get through that list. Very quickly like

Rhythm - fine, energy good, tempo quick
Suppleness - lacking laterally, cause lack of balance
Contact - not into outside rein
Impulsion - running past
Straightness - falling inward
Criteria - circle not round
Modifiers - none

5 - "horse must stretch to outside rein to improve lateral balance" (and even then maybe my scribe would kill me)


Needless to say, I'll be practicing a lot. We're already in works talking about doing a fix-a-test clinic because I'm not comfortable judging an official schooling show until I graduate. But I can easily practice judging, then chat with the rider about what I saw, then do it again. I've also informed Kate that I'll be showing up randomly during her students' test riding practice to judge them. And I'm obviously practicing on Youtube.

Even though it's a bit daunting, just like everything, practice makes perfect! I'll figure it out eventually. Until then, I'm just glad that Youtube has a pause button.

Applying the Fire Hose of Information

I returned late Sunday night from the L program. I was not in a good place physically, and honestly not all that good mentally either. What I thought might be allergies all weekend turned into a full on unpleasant cold at the PHX airport as I waited for my late flight to take off. As I flew my ears started to hurt and I was so miserable the rest of the night. 

I worked from home on Monday to save my coworkers from my illness and so I got to ride TC for a normal amount of time. I did feel better that day and at this point, I just have a lingering cough. 

Absolutely bursting from knowledge over the weekend, I actually did manage to have a good ride without completely flinging myself off our pathway. I rode in the covered arena and there were things that I really liked and things that I realized were going on that I hadn't noticed before. 

Best pony

New realizations:

TC doesn't want to connect to the left rein, but I think he is connected because I pull on it so much. I started to really notice when he was connected vs when I was just filling in the gap in the connection by taking back on the rein.  

TC's lazy leg isn't his left hind, it's his right hind. It doesn't want to push as much and so it pops off the ground early. At the program, the instructor REALLY emphasized the need for two even hind legs (crookedness is apparent in all movements, so I'm basically giving away a point per movement, that's 10%!). I've known that TC has that unevenness in his pushing, but this is where it really needs to start going away. 

LOOK AT THIS CAT, he's so cute

All the tiny little bobbles need to go away. It makes a huge difference in each movement AND in the collectives if TC doesn't need bits of communication like a slight wiggle of my inside ring finger or a poke with the spur to keep him on the left rein. A 9 is attainable even for horses who are 7 movers, we just insist on riding too much to earn them. 

Along with that last note, I began to notice all the weird shit I do to keep things together in the harder movements. We are not showing ease of movements in the simple changes or the counter canter. He labors a bit and I move my body around to accommodate him. It's not ideal and I need to continue to build his strength. IMO we're coming into this show with very weak canter work. I'm not expecting more than a 6 on either of those movements. We are weak at this level. I'm choosing to go anyway, and it's not like I'm beating him on a regular basis to get the movements out of him, but this is borderline unfair to him and he's going to get himself a lot of sugar and maybe a trail ride or two next weekend. 

Early morning ride before I left for the program

Tuesday I also got a good ride in and I chose to test ride again. Again, I don't normally test ride this much coming into a show but I really don't know how things are going to go and it's making me nervous. Plus, I haven't had a clean 2-3 yet. 

This time we had a beautiful 2-1! His canter medium was stellar, trot medium was on point, shoulder-in felt free and steady, halt was a bit too close to the rail so hitting it disrupted the rhythm but whatevs, the transitions were all so good, the ten meter circle is easy and fun. My main complaint was that he's anticipating a lot in the walk work and ruining his beautiful walk. So we're going to walk on contact a ton this week. 

We got through the trot tour at 2-3 and through the walk work and I did the stupid thing of thinking "is this going to be our first clean 2-3?" and then he BOLTED down the long side in the canter medium. He just gets so excited about them. 

He got in trouble but we kept going, had a good serpentine and simple change, then bolted in the second serpentine and then bolted coming up centerline. Fun! It was mostly because they were working with a tractor near the arena, so I get it, but still frustrating. 

Pls don't bolt in the medium canter thx

I took him into the covered and checked on the walk pirouettes. They feel slow and sticky but they're solid. I just can't feel his hind legs, remember? So I just have to trust that they're fine and not override them like an idiot. 

Then we cantered a bit and did a ton of counter canter. I don't like over schooling it because of Third level, but I really want this to go well. He was a good boy about it. A few solid simple changes later and we walked a bunch on contact to get him to stop anticipating. Then we were done! 

Generally I love how he's feeling. I'm able to ride the canter in a way I've never experienced on him (at least, not consistently) before. His trot is active and rideable as well. I think Tracey is really onto something and I can't wait to see her after this show and throw everything I've got into transforming his gaits.

L Program: Session A

This last weekend I completed the first session of Part 1 of the L Program! Again, with all the copyrights abound, I can't share any materials or anything, but I do feel comfortable talking about the structure of it and what I got out of it. My IG has some additional information if you're dying to know more about what I actually learned.

Friday afternoon I zipped down to Arizona. I had rented a car for the weekend, so I picked that up and then was on my way! In rush hour traffic! I didn't realize other places had traffic, so I hung out at a coffee shop until it died down and then headed to get my materials printed.

I hadn't had a ton of time leading up to the session to get that done, but flying down early had its perks. One hundred eighty pages and one large binder later and I was finished. I found my Airbnb and tried to sleep.

The L program has officially ruined my riding on him, I now
know too much and he managed to dislodge himself from my
seat and bolt through all his medium canters this morning

We started at 7:30 the next morning in the organizer's beautiful house. My Airbnb, which was the cheapest thing I had to pay for that weekend, was perfect, it was small but only a 20 minute drive from the location and the bed was super comfortable!

Saturday AM 

Most of the morning on Saturday was about rules and the program as a whole. For the most part, our instructor emphasized two things with regard to rules:

The judge must be flexible with unusual circumstances

The judge must be fair to all competitors.

This meant that if something insane happened, like A REAL EXAMPLE OF A LITERAL RACCOON FALLING FROM THE RAFTERS INTO THE DRESSAGE COURT DURING A RIDE, the judge must use their best judgment to help the rider. There were lots of good examples of how to handle the situation, but the idea is to set the horse and rider up for success. The judge must interpret the rules to uphold the sport, sure, but the judge must also be kind and honestly, have a sense of humor.

At the same time, the judge MUST be fair to all competitors. There can be a policy that if a raccoon falls from the rafters, you let the rider hang tight and then let them restart from where they were at. But if you tell one rider that they have polo wraps on, you then have to check in with EVERY RIDER and if you miss one, you're not being fair to that rider. It's best, as a judge, to not say anything to anyone, even if you notice they have boots on or an illegal piece of equipment.


Saturday PM

We began going over the training scale and the basics after lunch. There is a HUGE focus on rhythm, which makes sense. The purpose of dressage is to enhance the horse's natural (pure) gaits. The judge has no idea if your horse's canter is lateral because you bought a horse with a lateral canter or if it's lateral because your training is destroying its rhythm. The judge must judge what they see and nothing more.

We also went over suppleness, which was super interesting. The intricate details of bend and the various types of suppleness were fascinating. It's not new information, I mean, none of this honestly is, but it was really cool anyway. I think what I found I gained most, other than the practice scoring, was even more ways to encode/describe/remember these concepts. I feel like everything I knew about all this just got encoded more deeply.

Picture from the program

Sunday AM

Before lunch on Sunday, we finished the training scale and then we got to ask any questions we had.

I learned a bit about the rest of the sessions and then part 2. The next session is on the criteria of each movement and then the last session is on the collective marks. Part 2 is going to happen sometime next year, I'm in and will be going through it. Each of the three sessions (two practice exams and then the final) are held at horse shows and will probably be in Colorado! I also have to bring a scribe, which adds to the expense of it all, but at least I get to choose my scribe.

I also have to do a bunch of scribing myself. I already know what organizer I'm going to contact to scribe for. It's tough because I want to scribe locally, of course, but I also want to show myself and have my clients do shows. Soooo I'm going to be going to a lot of horse shows next year!

Then we take the final exam, it's a written and a practical. Most people pass the written, but the practical is harder. To pass with distinction, I need to be pretty much dead on the judges and have good comments (there's a lot of info on how we are allowed to do comments). So I'm going to need a LOT of practice. After the last session of Part 1, I'm going to start offering some remote test scoring if anyone would be interested. And in the mean time, if anyone has any posts where they posted a video of a test (at a rated show please) and a picture of the test sheet, please leave them in the link below! I need to study!


Sunday PM 

We finally got to see some horses for real on Sunday afternoon. We arranged ourselves in chairs as close as we could to the letter C and watched three groups of riders come in. Training level, First level, and Second level.

We were given numbers to hold up as the riders went through test movements and showed their horse's gaits. It was really amazing to have a wide variety of horses. In each group we had better trained horses and greener horses, fancy horses and more "normal" looking horses. We got to give a wide variety of scores from 3 to 9.

I think it'd be fun to be a demo rider and fully plan on volunteering if I ever get the chance, but you could tell which demo riders thought it was fun and which demo riders were irritated by the scores we were holding up. I suppose if you think your walk pirouette is good and then turn around to see a bunch of 4s, that can't feel good, but the more self aware the rider seemed to be, the happier they were, even if they were getting 4s. We need those 4s to help us, so we didn't mind when the rider made a mistake, though it is true that we want to see everyone succeed... positive comments with 8s and 9s are way easier to judge!

I finally got to flex my judging skills with this part, something I was nervous about. Having competed at a high level, riding with an L faculty member for 6+ years, bringing my students to many shows, and having lots of friends who are judges, I figured I wouldn't be toooo far off. And I wasn't! I need to re-calibrate a few things, but the main instructor said that I was spot on a few times with both my score and my reasons and I got bolder and bolder as time went on.

I had a full on (very civilized) argument with one of the instructors about walk pirouettes and came up against a few of the other participants who, in my opinion, were enamored by the quality of a horse and ignoring the problems in the connection. For the most part though, I was dead on and felt really good! I gained a ton of confidence knowing that my scores were accurate, I think I might be able to do this.

One thing they mentioned is not making allowances for breeds,
for example, friesians can't stretch but still penalize them.

Unfortunately I was sick the whole weekend. I got through the weekend just fine and learned a ton and had a lot of fun, but I will say that I hope I feel better for the next one!

I'm sure some theory posts will come out with more information. I can't figure out the balance between writing about what I'm learning without having problems with the copyright. So standby for that stuff. Feel free to DM me somewhere and chat if you're really curious though. I think everyone in my life is sick of me talking about it (poor non-horsey boyfriend has gotten the brunt of it "sticking in a walk pirouette is a RHYTHM PROBLEM and that's the most important thing so I went LOW with that but apparently too low"), so you'll be doing me a favor.

Rhombus to Rectangle Transformation

This last Saturday, I had another lesson! My last lesson before the horse show.

Logical people would probably make this lesson about test riding, or a movement they find particularly difficult. I don't honestly care about those things. Tracey is great at teaching the movements, don't get me wrong, but after my existential crisis with her two weeks ago and then figuring out why I'm feeling like this about my horse, I wanted her input on the basics.

So I came in, told her I have a horse show coming up, and then told her that I couldn't feel TC's hind legs and wanted to dissect that issue. At one point during the lesson, she said "this isn't a very good lesson right before a horse show, Megan" and I told her that I didn't care about the show, I knew I was going to score FINE and that I have managed my expectations and know I'm not going to get a 70%. That seemed to be a reasonable answer and she kept going.

He's so awkward, I love him though

The first thing we did was give me a very basic lesson on feeling when each hind leg was in a certain place. I'm very good at this when using my logical brain, I can feel the front legs easily, I know the rhythm of the gaits well, so I was right every time. I knew I was cheating and told her that, so I tried to close my eyes and screw up my orientation to just feel when the hind legs were under, not using logic. I was pretty shit at this an had to really dig into the feel in his back under each seat bone. He doesn't naturally get his hind legs under, so it's tough to feel where they are, but I eventually got better at feeling them.

Once in trot, I felt that "behind the leg" feeling that I know isn't him being behind the leg. I told Tracey that I just wanted to kick his hind legs under him. She said that's not physically possible to do. And then we had the most fascinating conversation about equine biomechanics I've ever been part of.

I've always thought that to collect a horse, you need to activate the hind end to bring it more under, and that by doing that, the mass of the horse gets rocked back onto the hind legs due to the engagement.

Best pony

At least with TC, activation of the hind legs does not bring them further under, because they are in an orientation of pushing. Adding more power makes them push harder. So even if I'm keeping the step short and he's not covering much ground, adding power pushes his body forward. Tracey emphasized the need to bring his mass back BEFORE doing anything with the hind end. Change his balance first. TC tends to go with his mass forward and his legs behind him, making his legs, the ground, and the underside of his belly into a rhombus shape. She wanted me to bring him to a rectangular shape by bringing his mass back, not pushing his legs under.

So I brought his mass back and told her that while I acknowledge that he was in a better balance, he felt even more behind my leg. She then said that while he was more rectangular, he was now leaving his legs on the ground for too long, and that this was probably what I was equating to being behind the leg.

I quickened the hind legs and now that his mass was back on his haunches, he was able to quicken them without running off his feet. And let me tell you, the trot completely transformed. For a few steps. But damn, huge difference. He had so much more tone and was so much more balanced and responsive.

Into canter, we talked about the asymmetric qualities of the canter and the timing of the transitions, but the interesting part was going back to that rhombus vs rectangle piece. Friesians have a very rhomboidal way of cantering and TC apparently shifts back and forth between a normal canter and a friesian canter as we go along. Tracey again wanted me to shift his weight backwards first, then quicken the hind legs. It was fascinating to see the difference. In his friesian canter, TC was much more on the forehand and when I went to chase him, he became more of a rhombus. When I managed to shift his weight back (huge slingshot feeling in my hip) and activate his hind leg just after doing so (because when I just shifted him, he'd break), he became a rectangle and the canter felt way more in front of me. At one point I told Tracey that I felt a canter half pass in there.

Friday night before my lesson = Kishi Bashi concert, one of the
best concerts I've ever been to

At the end of the lesson, we talked about quality of gaits generally. Tracey doesn't think TC is a particularly nice mover, but he does have three correct gaits with some good qualities and is showing us that his gaits can be transformed into nicer gaits. It's easy to get wowed by a flashy front end like TC's and ignore the fact that his hind legs literally travel in a way that is the opposite of what you want in dressage. But he's still the best pony and I'm planning on helping him understand how he needs to move (and planning on legend/adequan/all the joint supplements to help him with that too).

She did say that TC has a nice front end, especially when we've shifted his balance. High quality movers have an equal amount of extensor/flexor forces, while the lower quality movers have more extensor forces than flexor. It's what causes that lightness in front vs pulling themselves along in the front end. With TC, when I shift his weight back, he's able to use the extensor forces to push his front end up and backward, which is exactly what the fancier movers do. He just needs help developing the muscle to hold his mass back so he can use his good front end.

Lesson notes

I left the lesson super happy and not at all worried about the show. Mostly excited about the show because of all the mirrors in warm up so I could further dissect this information. It was probably one of the most educational lessons I've ever had. I was telling the SO that at this point in my riding career, a lot of what I'm learning is just rehashing stuff I already know in a different context - like TC-specific or rider biomechanics. This lesson was BRAND NEW INFORMATION and I haven't felt like that since my first Mary clinic almost two years ago.

I'm so glad I decided to start riding with Tracey again. And I think I'm realizing that I should probably do more of these lessons with her and less movement specific lessons. Not that she isn't fabulous with movements, but when I have a horse like the one she showed me I have, I don't need help with the movements because they're just there.

Worst Pep Talk Ever

Kate is out of commission for a little while. She's going to be okay, but circumstances beyond all of our control meant that she couldn't coach her students at an event last weekend. I stepped in for dressage and hauling, while another one of our trainer friends stepped in to coach the jumping phases. I love our community. I've never had such close relationships with other trainers before and it's really been fabulous.

Rode TC quite early to prep for the day at the show!

Anyway, spending time helping out with her kids at the show really solidified to me two things:
1) Children are not for me
2) I possess zero skills in dealing with them nor with their messed up teenage brains

Kate is great with kids, she understands them and can at least fake relating to them. I cannot relate. I just prefer to just stuff as much dressage knowledge into them as I can while ignoring all their angsty hormones.

The kids are used to Kate, obviously, so over the weekend I got brought a few problems that I was not prepared for.

Sunrise on the back of the pony

The first client went in for dressage and my pep talk was this:

"You know you're going to be last, so don't get your hopes up, okay?"

One of the moms heard me and was kind of horrified. But hey, we all have had those horses, right? Well, the kid got her hopes up and came out in last place, very upset, telling me "I got my hopes up" and then she went and laid dramatically in a chair for a while. The way you lay when you don't even deserve to be comfortable. I told her to get up and go do something else, she resisted but I insisted. You can be sad for a few minutes but if you know that it's going to be bad, don't act all dramatic about it when it isn't good.

Kate's tack room set up is AMAZING, I want one of these

Next one comes in and someone cuts her off in warm-up, then yells at her. You know, like you do when you're a professional in your sport and you see a child in your way. Instead of saying anything productive, here's what I chose to say:

"Oh, that's just [person], have you noticed the slight change in the gravitational pull of the earth? Yes, that's us changing orbit to actually revolve around her rather than the sun"

Then I realized that was snarky and added:

"You're winning warm-up bingo, you can check off both the 'got cut off' box and the 'got yelled at' box now, congratulations. This is part of showing, just ignore her and get back out there"


We had a nice long break for a while so I corralled half the kids and took them to the show jumping arena. I told them that I needed to work on the computer and then proceeded to ignore them. Kate messaged me to see how things were going and then I realized that I was being bad at being Kate. Kate always uses things like this as learning opportunities. It went like this:

Me: Make sure you're learning something, Kate would want you to learn
Them: We need to watch a few rounds first
Me: Okay makes sense
...
Them: *on their phones*
Me: Have you been learning?
Them: Uhhhh
Me, to Kate over text: They aren't learning, Kate, I don't know how to make them learn
Kate over text to me: Ask them what the hardest line on course is and why
Me: What is the hardest line on course? What makes it hard?
Them: *explodes with what they learned*

I hauled Kate's rig, it drives like a giant Prius

Later on in the day, one of the kids said she was bummed about dressage and how she'll never be good at it. Here's my pep talk from that:

"You're not a gymnast okay? This is not your prime. You realize that many of our Olympians are in their 50s or so, right? If you think this is as good as it's going to get, you're wrong"

Also this:

"You can feel bad, that's fine, your brain is literally ripping itself to shreds, you have no prefrontal cortex and all your neurons are fucked. Being a teenager is the worst, I'm sorry you're going through that, it'll get better later."
- silence -
"Feel free to use that on your parents next time they're mad at you"

Me, after dealing with teenagers

So you know, don't let me around your kids. It'll do us all a favor.

Busy Times

I’ve been complaining a lot about being busy and figured I’d talk a little about what I’ve been doing. 

I dropped/lost (it was mutual) a client at the end of September but gained so many in August/September that I haven’t been able to feel the lighter workload that one less client provides me this month. As a horse trainer, life has been great! So it's been insane and I'm fighting burnout on the regular. 

Busy days mean getting up before the sun does to drive out to
the barn in the fog

My regular clients are all doing well. For the most part, all of them are at different stages of connection. Seeing the horses finally GET it and reach for the contact is cool, as is watching their toplines grow. Having my riders feel the connection for the first time has been really fun as well. And everyone is working hard on their biomechanics alongside getting ready for shows and pony club ratings. 

Teaching clinics has been fun too, I have a great group of riders to teach once a month and am hoping to add another regular barn for clinics in the spring. I really love teaching clinics! My regular clients are so fun, but it’s a lot of responsibility. It’s all worth it because I adore my regular clients, but being able to go teach 5-8 lessons once a month is great. It’s fun to see the progression with them, as they have more time between lessons to progress so I get to see a greater difference. 

But of course, teaching is a lot of work. And work is a lot of work. And riding too. And commuting. Also I start my L program this weekend so that’s going to be a lot of work. This new SO is more supportive of me than I've ever experienced (do they frequently make people like this?), so he’s happy to work around my schedule, come with me when I go clinic (!!), and encourages me, buuuuut naturally much of my free time is now tangled up.  

This is me working (job #1) from a horse show I was
coaching at (job #2) last weekend

With all these busy times, I'm struggling a little bit, I frequently feel emotionally raw and physically exhausted. Getting enough sleep has been tricky. Getting to the gym is basically NOT happening right now. It's hard to say no to lessons coming into winter when the rain literally rains on my parade horse training business. 

But it's been so worth it. I've hit every goal I've set out this year. My goal of elevating my level of financial security was blown out of the water, I'm way ahead on my retirement savings and am feeling more comfortable than I have in the past. My goal of finding really good clients to ride with me on a regular basis has been met tenfold it seems. Everyone is so supportive and understanding (and those who aren't are shown the door) and I'm so excited for the progress they're making. 

With everyone enjoying their lessons and being so supportive, I'm getting good feedback. Owners of horses noticing that their horses are packing on muscle and are more mentally relaxed. Riders saying that they feel more secure in the tack, that their horses feel better, texts about how well they're doing at shows, or seeing them trot up centerline in person. All of this has nearly killed my impostor syndrome, for the first time ever I feel like an actual horse trainer. My language has been changing. I talk about my business as a business, not as this thing I do and sometimes people pay me. I talk about having riders in my program, although I'm not a traditional training program, I do have several that I see at least twice a week, so that's my version of a program. 

Feeling better is one thing, but because of how hard I'm working, I am really excited for the winter because I get to actually take a real live normal human vacation this year (planning for early spring so as to not miss show season but also not go right before hard times financially). I'm also going to get a lot of random days off due to rain. I decided that the first day that rain stops me from teaching, I'm going to take the day off work and just lay around like a slug all day. So excited to do that! 

If I can swing two vacations next year, this is the other place we
will be going! 

So generally, even though the blog has taken a back seat (as has the gym, as has my sleep), I'm really happy. I can't sustain this kind of crazy schedule forever, but I think I can do another year like this before I start looking for a way to condense my schedule. Who knows what will happen in the future, but for now, I'm very happy! Very busy and sleep-deprived... but happy. And that's more than I could say last year at this time! 

L Program: Prepping for the First Session

I leave for the first session of the first part of the L program in a week! I bought my flights, have a very cute (and cheap) airbnnb about 20 minutes away, have rented a car, got my homework (haven't done it yet though, I've been slammed at both my jobs recently), and got the schedule. We are ready to go.

I was at a conference this week (because I don't
have enough to do) and got to eat this

Here are my first impressions:

1) I love the materials. I feel like I've learned SO MUCH just by glancing through them. I apparently need to print them all out and bring them in a binder. I'm also going to be bringing my computer just in case I can use it to take notes because I type faster than I write. I will bring a notebook too. 

2) The schedule goes 8am to 4pm each day, which doesn't seem like that much to me. I'm not sure what I expected. But the schedule itself looks fun! I don't know if I can actually share it, but here are the basics:

Saturday AM: Rules 

Saturday PM: Biomechanics

Sunday AM: Biomechanics

Sunday PM: Demo riders 

3) The faculty member seems excellent! Each session is taught by a different person, and we got information on this person this week. I'm really excited to learn from her, she's an S judge and has been in the industry for a while. 

4) I was worried about feeling completely overwhelmed and over my head, but I don't think that will be the case. I feel strong in biomechanics, both horse and rider. And the demo riders will be fun to watch! After riding with Tracey (S judge and L faculty member), teaching for 15 years, bringing my riders through the FEI, and showing through GP myself, I'm thinking that I'm as well prepared as I could be for this program. 

5) When I get home, I have a week before I show Second level, I really hope that it doesn't ruin my perspective for that show.

6) As someone who is very introverted and who generally doesn't get chatty/ask questions/etc with new people, I'm going to push myself way out of my comfort zone. I want to ask a lot of questions (let me know if you have any!) and get to know everyone as best as possible. 

Looking forward to applying everything I learn!

I will for sure be writing about the experience and what I learn! So looking forward to this program, I have been wanting to do it for ages and I'm glad I finally get to go. 

Blog Hop: Ten Questions for October

Thanks again to L for providing me with blog hop content so that my blog isn't so barren all the time these days! I cannot wait for winter, you guys. Cannot. Wait.

Downside about winter: cannot enjoy the trails as easily

1. What discipline do you ride? What would you ride if you could pick any other one?

I'm a dressage rider. I think if I had unlimited time and money, I'd love to event again.



2. How many horses have you ridden in your entire riding career?

Oh I have no idea. Lots. Hundreds. I hop on a fair amount in clinics, especially the ones with questionable connections, to see what is going on. I can't even guess.



3. Most bizarre activity you've done with your/a horse?

I don't know how bizarre any of these are, but Rico had to put up with a lot. During finals week, I'd go through flash cards when walking him. I often brought my 3DS on trail rides so he could just cart me around while I played video games. I've jumped him bridless. I've stood on his back. I've roped off of him. TC is lucky that he's such a dingbat or he'd be subjected to all of this and more.

Best horse in the world

4. Do you consider riding to be your outlet? If yes, why?

I suppose. I've mostly classified it as a compulsion. Something I have to do, like breathing or sleeping or eating. An outlet like, to help me relax? No. Riding does not help me relax unless you'd say that hard drugs help an addict relax. Riding is a great source of stress for me and I genuinely think that my life would probably be better without riding. But I can't not ride.



5. Have you ever read horse-related magazines? If yes, which one(s)?

When I was a kid I definitely did, I mostly read Dressage Today and Practical Horseman. Now everything is on the internet and I have almost no free time anyway.



6. Most memorable advice given to you?

I've heard a lot of memorable advice. I think what makes me a good test rider though is hearing these words "ride the horse, not the test" which really resonated with me. Sometimes my riders, especially those without enough show experience, will throw their riding out the window and just basically steer and kick through the test. Instead, they must ride the horse within the confines of the test.

Along the same lines, hearing Heidi say "it's just arithmetic" when we were talking about getting my Gold medal has also made me a way better test rider. If I know I can get an 8 on a transition if I just wait an extra step, vs a 5 now, I'll do that and take the 7 with "late transition" as the comment, rather than the 5 with "abrupt" as the comment.

Arithmetic

7. Did you ever collect Breyer horse models or similar?

Yes, my mom bribed me to go to the dentist by getting me a Breyer each time. Also I got bribed with a Breyer to not kick the doctor. Wow, kids are the worst.



8. Favorite "celebrity" horse?

I honestly don't follow horses or even riders all that much. I don't know why, I've never been a celebrity person in general. I do not keep up with anyone.



9. If you could spend a day learning from any horse person (past or present), who would you choose?

See above. Honestly at this point, I'd like to follow Mary Wanless around and watch her teach lessons.

I'd say Tracey but I can barely handle my
two-to-three-times-a-month lessons lol

10. If you could ride in any international arena in the world, where would you choose?

Just ride or compete? I'll keep it realistic and say that I'd love to compete in the Golden State CDI ring one day. Just gotta get the horse, more money, and a lot of luck. I think I've got the drive, the trainer, and the time.

Feather-Induced Test-Ruining Leaping

I signed up for the show at the end of this month. I was feeling kind of questionable about it but decided to just do it. I should have tried harder to get into the same show a year ago and show these tests, there's no reason to wait any longer. They just aren't going to ride any better.

Well, they could ride a bit better. We test rode this past weekend and it was fine. It was fine. I mean, we would have been eliminated from the 2-3, which sucks because I honestly think that might be our better test.

Still got time for wandering

The 2-1 rode fine, there's really not much to it. The mediums are on the shorter diagonal, the canter mediums are only 3/4 of the way down the long side, there's no walk pirouettes or canter to walk transitions, and it's just shoulder-in. But at the same time, some of the elements still were tricky, mostly because there aren't a ton of movements to make up for some of our weak stuff. His walk to canter transition just isn't as through as it needs to be, and because we've schooled the simple changes enough, he thinks about doing them during the counter canter pattern.

But generally I was really happy with the test, being a bit easy isn't a problem, but I do believe a clean 2-1 will result in a lower score than a clean 2-3. Not that my horse is a clean-test kind of horse.

The 2-3 is a much better test for us when things go well... His counter canter loop is excellent unless he gets off balance on the right lead and goes to swap in front. I can hold it but it feels slightly precarious at times. Whatever. A fully confirmed counter canter before flying changes can get you stuck at Second level indefinitely. The walk pirouettes ride beautifully, there's something about this horse and that movement, he really has good instincts with them and I can really fuck that movement right up and he just does it. Good boy, earning your keep.

The haunches-in is... well, it exists. He slows down a bit in it and shuffles to get the right amount of angle, but it's fine. The shoulder-in to ten meter circle rides quite well so I'm not too fussed about a weak haunches-in. I feel like Second level is the level where you're just kind of low key bad at everything.

Simple changes feel great, going away from the judge is preferable, although she'll be able to see him get wide behind. Rico didn't have clean simple changes until like... Fourth level. TC's are clean, they just sometimes feel like I'm riding a bag of rocks down a hill.

Sunrise driving to the barn before teaching and working and
teaching some more

Now, the place where we would have gotten eliminated in the 2-3 was OBVIOUSLY the medium canter on the left lead. He exploded a few times in our test riding, which is fine, it's just him. But he saw a feather when we just started the medium canter and then he leapt sideways, landed with the court in between his left and right pairs of legs, then leapt again and we were outside the court.

Ugh. Horse. Seriously. Please keep your fingers crossed for a low-wind day, not that he's afraid of wind, it's that he likes to play with things floating around in the wind.

So we'll see how THAT goes. It's not a big deal to get eliminated, really, I just want to get in the show ring. Ideally we'll like, end our test inside the court with a halt and a salute rather than by jumping out of the ring, but unfortunately this is just who TC is at times. He really has no respect for that tiny fence around the arena (non-horsey SO thought I was weird to be nervous that he'd jump out of the arena "is that really a concern?" I forgot to explain that I'm not worried about him jumping out of the actual arena, just the court).

Remember this bullshit?

But other than that, we're feeling as ready as we can be given that 1) I've been working VERY hard this fall and have been a whiny bitch about it for weeks to the point where it's a miracle if my friends or family don't murder me before the show, 2) I haven't been able to ride TC nearly as long or as much as I would like coming into our first show of the year, and 3) TC is clearly a show jumper who missed his calling and I'm making a bad decision trying to contain his enthusiasm in a tiny sandbox.

I want to test ride a bit more and we have our last lesson with Tracey this weekend (unless it's another shit show lesson and then I'll take a day off work to get one before the show). Then it's just a weekend off of riding for me to start the L program and the following weekend is the show! I am genuinely excited for it, I want to braid him (using Peony's Spot On Braiding Wax, of course!), get all dressed up, brush that damn tail out, and hear how pretty his color is from strangers. It will be fun and I'm managing my expectations score-wise to keep it fun even if we don't get the scores I've been hoping for.

How to Manufacture a Hind Leg

When we left off, I was hyper-analyzing a situation, which, let's be real, is my near constant state, so it's nothing to write home about.

All my best friends

Kate came out to ride TC this Tuesday. She first watched me ride and asked me a lot of questions/told me what she saw:

- I started out showing her what I thought in front of my leg was. She said he looked like his back was tense and dropped. I said yes I could see that in the mirror and that it felt like I had to kind of hold him on the bit vs carry my hand, but that he felt in front of me soooo ?

- I brought him to a place where Tracey wants him but he feels behind my leg at the trot. Kate asked me to describe that and I actually couldn't describe it easily. He feels like he would stop if I took my leg off, but then when I did, he didn't stop. He feels like he would refuse to do a canter transition, but when I asked he did it. He feels like we couldn't do any lateral work from the trot, but he can.

- We went into canter and I put him in a canter where I felt like he was in front of my leg. He was mildly hollow and difficult to steer for me on the left side.

- Then I put him lower, softer, and slower at the canter and he lifted his back, but I felt like he was going to drop out from under me. He broke to trot a couple of times but nothing dramatic.

Hi, wanna see me make my neck REAL SHORT

After that, Kate got on. She rode him for a bit and I kept harassing her about what she was feeling. And then she said this:

"This is going to sound weird"
"Just tell me in whatever words make sense to you"
"I can't feel the ground, I can only feel it down to his hip but not down to his feet, there's a black hole back there"

Oh.

And she's right. When riding TC, you cannot feel his hind leg. We determined that there is some muscle not firing in his lower back that is responsible for that feeling. That muscle gets switched on in a negative way when he bolts or when I run him off his feet, so I can feel the hind legs and even if they feel like crap, I can at least feel them.

Love this place

I had brought my piaffe whip and had Kate trot around me. I tapped TC's haunches and when she could feel his hind legs, she'd pet him and I'd stop. He looked incredible. He was recruiting different muscles in his back and abdomen in those moments and you could see his hind end interact with the ground in a very different way than he normally does. More with his heel than his toe.

Kate and I switched and I got on him, handing Kate the whip. I trotted around her and aided for a shortened step while she tapped. I felt it a bit in trot, but especially coming back to walk. I felt him in front of me in the way that I had wanted. He felt like he was carrying me forward.

And it's not "in front of the leg" as much as I could feel where his haunches ended and where they were going. And THAT'S what I'm getting on my client's horse that I can't feel on TC. It has nothing to do with his level of responsiveness or being in front of the leg. It has everything to do with the way TC interacts with the ground in his hind legs.

Not for sale, if I can't afford a good hind leg, I'll make one

We brainstormed some things to implement into TC's program:

1) I am going to bring Kate out to help me on the ground once a week.
2) I am going to do piaffe work in hand once a week
3) I am going to clicker train holding his hind legs up for 30-60 seconds at a time
4) I am going to do long and low over raised trot rails
5) I am going to teach TC how to jump small cavalletis to work up to getting him comfortable with a series of small bounces

TC is also going to start adequan and I'm putting him on a muscle builder again. He's also going on some aloe pellets just in case this work stresses him out.

Tracey was concerned about putting a piaffe on him because of his mental state, but he loves me and he loves Kate, so he just thought that was a fun game. We're going to have the clicker and some cookies next time so it's even more fun for him.

I'm so grateful for friends like Kate who I can throw on my horse, tell her what I'm feeling, and ask her what she thinks of him. And now we'll see how much the piaffe training helps with all of this! Either way, it's fun to be working on something like that.