Becoming an Amateur - Part 1

I started my horse trainer journey when I was fifteen years old. Our neighbor's granddaughter wanted to learn to ride and I was cheap and nearby. I charged $10 a lesson and I thought that was quite good because it was above the minimum wage. Kind of insane that it is still above the federal minimum wage, but I digress. 

Her mom would pick me up because I couldn't drive yet and my mom thought that was great because she could just stay home and I'd teach my student and ride my horse and probably end up cleaning paddocks before she'd come get me in the evening. 

My lessons were objectively not good, but I LOVED teaching so much. I loved riding more, but teaching was so much fun because I loved watching my riders progress, I loved the aha moment when they understood a new concept (or an old concept), and I loved trying to figure out how to help a tricky horse. 

Shoutout to my friends for getting this
made for me, I still have it!

Young trainer Megan
reading a test for a client
after being assured
earlier that the client
knew the test lol

I loved it so much that when I graduated from high school, I was like right, I'd like to do this for work. And my parents said no and I got sent to college instead. Since that's what you did in the early 2000s, you went to college.

Four years later I was still quite far away from a degree and completely out of the college fund that had been put aside for me. But I had grown my business and so I dropped out, moved into a cheap apartment, and took a part time job as an eventing trainer's assistant to have a more steady income outside of working with my own clients. 

A few years later, and it's in the early stages of this blog, I realized that I wanted more stability in my life (aka health insurance after I had several accidents leading up to a mild concussion that I had to ride with the day after) and so I did go back to school. I continued teaching full time in my undergrad, and then backed off to 20-30 hours a week while in graduate school. But my intention was not to quit teaching.

There were signs though

Girl you take so many days off now

So I didn't! I continued teaching while also working at my academia job until we were about a year into the pandemic. And that's when it all really came to a head. I learned SO much during the pandemic, and the main thing was this: if I live my life in a way that is right on the edge of what I can handle stress-wise, things like the pandemic, which I have no control over, are incredibly debilitating. And it's stressful to work two jobs! 

And so in 2021, I ended up taking 3 months medical leave from the college I was working at so that I could recover from intense burnout and do something I never thought I would - set myself up to stop teaching. 

I shut down my business in August of 2021, after I had my two last students achieve two big achievements - one got their USDF Silver Medal on a horse we'd trained together since the horse was 4 years old, the other achieved their C3 Dressage and HB pony club ratings less than two years after learning her diagonals with me. And then I walked away from teaching, outside of teaching a few remote lessons here and there for about a year or two afterward. 

I achieved so much myself as a pro that I think would
have been much harder to achieve as an amateur

My goal was to go into tech because I had decided, after my brother had his first kid here, that I wanted to stay in the bay area. And it's quite difficult to live here just working one job without that job being in tech. Long term, I wanted to be a data engineer at a well known tech company. I loved everything I was learning about data engineering and at the time, the bigger companies seemed much more stable (LOL not as much anymore, but it's fine). 

But I had no tech experience and was not a data engineer in my current role. So I prioritized finding a company that would not stress me out (too much) and a job that I could do with my current skills, bonus points if it seemed like I could transition to DE inside that company. 

I found just that, after months of interviewing and turning down offers when it just didn't feel right, in February of 2022. The job was easy, the company was large and stable, and there was a lot of growth potential for me in my career there. In September of that same year, I left my ex who had been supporting me through this transition and I was struggling more than I had ever been training horses. I thought briefly about teaching again, but instead, I poured myself into my work and got promoted six months later. 

Rode a lot of really cool horses too

All while this is going on, TC is starting to have issues and I was not riding as much. I prioritized work and it ended up being a really really good thing. It let me fully detach from thinking that I'd go back to showing/teaching ever, it let me find hobbies (pottery, drawing, birds, photography, traveling, etc) that were not horse related, and it let me find a life outside of horses for the first time really ever. 

In 2024, I switched teams to a data engineering team and things really started to take off for me, the salary bump made me much more comfortable and the next year I started traveling more. TC remained on the back burner, but in 2025 I decided that I was going to give it one last shot. 

And then now, this year, things are actually going pretty amazing. I got promoted to senior data engineer with a far exceeds expectations, my third one since joining the company just four years before. TC is going better than ever. And I'm truly living my amateur dream life. 

There are times that I miss teaching, I miss taking my clients to shows, I miss working on a tricky movement. I really miss the people I would meet too - boarding on private property and not really doing any clinics (like riding in them) or shows (with my students or my own), means that I don't really talk to horse people very much anymore. Outside of my core friend group, I mostly have conversations about like... work, and birds, and travel plans, what the weather is like, what television show someone is watching, someone's weekend plans, why does that man in the office clear his throat in the most disgusting way? 

But I do think that amateur life is a much better fit for me now. I do not regret the path I took or that I chose to become a professional straight out of being a junior, but I also do not regret the more recent changes either. I love that I get to experience every aspect of riding like this. 

Including traveling way more, like to this amazing
place in Uruguay, where I went for 3 weeks in
January of this year, take that, 23 year old Megan
who never took days off!

I think I'll cut it off here as more of a background post, and in the next one, I'll share more about the differences I've found and what I've learned going from a professional to an amateur. And maybe we'll talk about what the actual paperwork situation is, because I haven't done that yet (no intention of showing this year, but I am qualified to be an amateur now!). 

Do Less

I really need to do a lot of updates but I keep writing them and then not posting them. So today I'm going to talk about my lesson with Kate and then we'll eventually get to the other stuff. Rico is great just to get that out of the way. I think every blog post should have that written first. 

TC has been really good recently. Not great, but good. He had some down time this summer because my little cat went through a health crisis - she was finally diagnosed with small cell lymphoma (a slow moving cancer in her GI and liver) and is doing much better on her medication, but TC has been on the back burner and will unfortunately stay there until she's stabilized. 

TC with his new fly mask

Much of my life looks like this right
now as we try to get her stabilized on
medication + put weight back on

Just as I'm starting to be able to breathe again after Jade's diagnosis, TC decides he wants to see the vet for his eyeballs, so I had to call the emergency vet out one day because his eyes were swollen, red, and had a ton of discharge. He got eye ointment 3x a day for a week and then has been fine. I tell you, I'm not doing much clicker training under saddle anymore, but for things like this, so grateful to have that tool. He went from being very tall to letting you put the ointment in his eyes while loose in his stall. 

THEN we start to come back to work and I have a vacation planned. So I finally just broke down and had my trusty rider ride him. She is a fabulous up and coming young rider who is riding at the PSG level on her own horse, she rides TC so beautifully and she refuses to get wrapped up in his dumb games. So she rode him three times last week, then I decided to keep the momentum going with a lesson today.

Said vacation included riding on this sea plane!

I called him "eyeballs" for a while

As I said, TC has been good, not great. Like we're doing all the stuff, he's doing shoulder-in, haunches-in, half pass. We're doing walk to canter and canter to walk transitions, some counter canter work. I've been working on a little half step to keep him better engaged. You know, we're DOING stuff. This has been really amazing, don't get me wrong, he feels better than he has in years. 

But he doesn't feel like... FABULOUS. Which at least when I was riding with my previous trainer (a couple trainers ago), I was told to come to terms with. TC is not a high quality horse the way that Rico is or some of my former clients' horses. He's a big, loose mover, but the quality just isn't there the way that it is in a purpose bred horse. "Get over it" was what I was told. 

Except that if he's a little luggy or a little blah in the connection, it's not that fun to ride. And I feel like such a jerk saying that because a year or two ago I would have killed to be working on his lateral work again, or the canter work like this. But I've found myself this summer looking more forward to trail rides than to arena rides. So I figured I'd take some lessons and call on my rider more often to help push TC and I past this luggy part. 

Rico looking AMAZING with all his
dapples, btw TC is only an inch taller
than him, wth

Eyeballs eyeing the cows

So today was TC and my first lesson since Kate was out in person in May (just before all my cat drama started). Kate had ridden him and it was like magic, TC was so so sharp to my aids and so together and the best part about it was that HE was super excited about work. 

I want to be able to get him there myself, but I 1) am fully immersed in stereotypical amateurdom right now (mostly just not being fit to ride) and 2) have such an emotional history with this horse that it makes riding him really tricky for me sometimes. Especially when I have to sharpen him up. It's like I'm flooded with the idea of here we go again vs understanding that he can be trained, we fixed the underlying issues that were causing his balking (and if we didn't, I have to work him to find out that his balking is back, and then we'll go to back the vet). 

We started on a square in walk, with Kate wanting me to ride shoulder-in from corner to corner, asking him to halt in shoulder-in. For a horse who was wanting to stop the whole time, having to halt in shoulder-in was surprisingly difficult. It required him to organize himself better and he's not a particularly tidy animal when it comes to his legs and body. 

We talked a lot about the sharpness to the aids since I feel like this is going to be our biggest issue for a while. TC is responsive to the aids, but not sharp to them. And I fall into the trap of it being good enough, especially good enough with a little nagging here and there to keep him from stopping. Kate encouraged me to evaluate how he felt from 1-10, with 10 being extremely sharp, and to also stop nagging/just let him stop. It's a lesson I've had before and will continue to require for the rest of my life. I asked Kate to please record a ringtone or something, toss up some audio on spotify maybe? something that just progressively asks me whether I am doing more work than my horse, so that I could listen to it while riding. Or maybe I'll print out and laminate some signs for myself around the arena. 

TC also got some bombproofing

And I climbed all over him

From there, we continued to address the sharpness with transitions, I was to halt in the corner of our square, then ask TC to trot to the next corner into a halt. If TC didn't respond to my leg aid, I was to tap him lightly, then show him the whip and tap him harder. TC figured this out VERY quickly and was much easier to ride the rest of the lesson. I did discover that some of my hesitation to really demand this is that I get a little left behind sometimes because I am woefully unfit for riding right now and I felt guilty not staying with him when I'm asking him to be forward. 

Kate pointed out that it wouldn't happen if he was reliably forward, and I also decided that like... I'm not even 10% of this horse's body weight, I'm not pulling on him or slamming on his back when it happens, I'm just getting slightly out of balance behind him. So he can deal with it? He works 5 days per week for an hour, two of those days being trail rides? Just handle it bro. 

Because he's literally a kids horse now,
that's my 6yo niece on him bareback on
the trails without me leading him (because
he bites me)

They even played in the sprinklers
together and he loved it

I had really wanted to work on the canter with Kate because I had done some changes about a month ago and while (very excitingly, I am very excited about this) they were all clean, they were also quite downhill. Which granted, was how they used to be too. I definitely want to get the changes better quality and start playing with multiples eventually, but clearly we are not quite there yet. Especially on the left lead, TC feels quite downhill and when I ask him with my aids to sit down a bit, he either quits or props with his hind legs. 

Kate had me alternate between shoulder out to haunches-in, to shoulder-in in canter. I'd done a little half pass on him in canter about a month ago but haven't really done much lateral work in canter at all. Right now the canter feels more like survival than work. But this work completely changed things for us. Not only did he feel more uphill, it kind of distracted me from babying him about the canter. Like he can sustain a canter for longer than I thought. And it also let us have a few discussions about what to do when he breaks. I'm supposed to scoot him forward - and I tend to not let him break. I get too involved in hoiking him along and then that's just how we canter. 

We talked a bit about how sometimes with these horses that are good like this, there are not a lot of training opportunities. Like he's doing a good job, he's responsive enough, he's collected enough, he's supple enough. And especially if I'm intervening when there's a chance he won't be quite right, that leaves me zero time to actually train him to be better. He needs to make a mistake, be asked not to make that mistake, then be allowed to make the mistake again and choose not to, then be rewarded for the right choice. Not prevented from making the mistake in the first place and not be rewarded for anything because I'm like eh it was fine. 

Once I had scooted him forward for breaking a couple of times from canter, the canter felt WAY more rideable and way better. Like he was taking me much more seriously and I could just focus on the exercise instead of thinking so much about the horse under me. 

He's learned to stand still a bit better
for his kids when grooming too

Lots of tractor work recently for me

Our last bit of work was some more in the trot. I felt like I had plenty in canter to work on - mostly lateral work and just letting him break, I want to try that for a couple of weeks and see where we are. But the trot historically has been quite difficult for me. We did an exercise that hurt my brain - a figure-8 where one circle was shoulder-in and one was shoulder out. Then we did an even worse exercise that hurt my brain even more, I can't even remember it, it was a ton of lateral work all in walk. 

The idea in the lateral work is again to get him just trucking along on his own. I want to help too much and get my legs all doing stuff. I have a LOT of work to do in this department, I feel so awkward in the lateral work now after not doing it for so long. Sometimes it feels like my upper body is just doing stuff on its own and then I'm like hey wait a minute, why am I collapsing like that. 

The other thing I need to work on is giving him more support with my left rein when tracking right. That is the hand I like to pull on, but I've definitely overcompensated for the pulling by not really having it connect. So when we do our lateral work to the right, he doesn't stand up so well on the left front because there's no support there for him. Instead, he folds his neck in half to the right and juts the base of his neck to the left. Once I had him straighter, he felt way way better. 

Little cat taking advantage of my policy
with old/sick animals: they can do what
they want, Rico is proud I'm sure

All in all it was a fabulous lesson. I feel so lucky to have Kate helping me with my silly gray horse. I'm genuinely looking forward to my next ride on him! Hopefully as things with my little cat stabilize (right now she's getting blood work every 2 weeks as we try to get her liver values back to normal, hopefully we can get to a point where she only needs blood work every 2-3 months!) I can ramp up my lessons and maybe even some training rides from my rider so that we can get TC into more work without me having to ride so much since I do need to do my job. 

This fall may be a little wonky as my priority stays with my little cat, but I'm really hoping to set us up well for next year. Because I think I've decided I'd really like to get this horse back to the show ring. Even if it's just at Training level or something. And honestly just for the pictures and so that I can get my amateur status finalized and put my first ride as an amateur into my record. Also I had bought a new coat I haven't worn in the show ring yet, a travesty. 

Straightness and Connection

Over the weekend, I had really good rides on TC! 

I rode in the arena on Friday and Monday, and then Saturday we did a trail ride at home and on Sunday he had the day off since I had a prior obligation that kept me away from the barn. 

Requires cookies

Does not require hugs, rider wanted a hug though

My ride right after our trail ride last week (I think Tuesday?) wasn't the best. I think he was tired and just a little above where he needed to be, not really lifting through his shoulders. But he also only had the one day off in between. I did more face pulling than I had been doing and I ended up cutting the ride a little short. We did a trail ride at home on Wednesday and that was great, then he had Thursday off. 

Friday I came out and ended up riding in the middle of the day. After sleeping VERY well for two weeks, I told people I was sleeping well AND I got my hopes up that after eight years of insomnia, I'd finally fixed it; so naturally, I haven't been able to sleep a lick since.

It was a bit hot, so TC and I struggled a little through the warm up. I'm still not quite sure how to approach the warm up with him. I tend to get a little frustrated that he starts out slow (not balky, but like, could you have an ounce more power in any of your gaits) and I'm sure he's frustrated that I want to skip the warm up and jump right into doing work when he's now fifteen years old and has some joint stuff. 

Lots of ranch work this weekend, pastures got
mowed!

And trails got widened/worked on!

I've tried employing what I did with Rico years ago, which is to canter first. But this horse is not a canter horse, if we do that, his canter just feels lethargic and gross. So we trot first, doing big circles and some easy transitions. Then we canter and it's absolutely fine. And then finally when we come back to trot, he seems happy to work. 

Again, acknowledging that being happy to work hasn't really been him at any point of his rides the last few years, so it's great that we can get there!

I can't quite remember exactly what we worked on that day, but most of my work these days are on:

1. Remembering that I know how to ride horses

2. Shoulder-in

3. Counter canter loops

4. Walk to canter

And now reading that back, it sounds like we're schooling Second level. We are not! I just find that these exercises are really good for us. 

Oh hello counter canter!?

Shoulder-in, which we also did on Monday, has been super helpful for getting him to find more stability in his body and finding the diagonal connection from the inside hind leg over his body to the outside rein. Tracking left, he feels pretty good, but tracking right, he really struggles. He wants to come a little above the outside rein and twist his neck. 

Counter canter loops, and on Monday, 20m half circles in counter canter, have been great for the straightness and the connection. He again gets kinda twisty in his body and my enthusiasm for pulling on the left rein means that we go careening sideways in canter sometimes. 

And finally, the walk to canter transition is something he's long been good at and enjoys, but he likes to jump to the outside of the line during the transition, AND it's obvious to me when he does it AND I'm a better canter rider than trot. So I figure that I can help him find straightness in the transition and that this will help us find straightness in the canter in general. 

So a friend told me that putting a fake
dragonfly on your horse keeps flies
away and I think it's so funny (and I 
kind of think it works?)

And he's just happy?

The remembering how to ride horses thing keeps happening. I haven't had that many lessons since 2020, and even then I was mostly riding alone. Which is FINE I was a professional. Now I am not, I'm deep in amateurdom after years of not really riding. I'm also not nearly as fit as I was before and am super out of practice. 

On Friday, I remember going along thinking, wow, he's kinda down in his shoulder, bummer. And then a circle or two later I was like OH, what if I... asked him not to be. And I put my leg on and kinda bumped him up under himself and he said yes! And then it all went so so much better. 

Then on Monday, and if my Pivo hadn't been such an asshole, I'd have a hilarious video, because I was trotting and kind of lamenting about how unstable I felt in the trot, like he kept falling out in this one place and I was just letting him do it and reacting to it rather than preventing it. And I think I said out loud right near the camera "oh my god I could use my abs for this" and again the ride went much better. 

Remember how you have abs?

So much reach with his hind end now

Luckily I find this just hilarious. I'm truly enjoying experiencing both sides of the coin. I put so much pressure on myself to ride well and learn as much as I could and be USDF Gold Medalist Megan. And now I get to be an amateur, and I'm learning SO much about myself and about horses and about dressage from this other side. Maybe I should write down what the differences feel like. 

Anyway, what it means is that I can remain in really good spirits about the whole thing. When I forget how to ride horses it just cracks me up, like people used to pay me to do this and now I'm like oh woops, why is my hand over there? How long has it been like that? Have I always done that?

Truly I'm having the time of my life no matter what is going on with my riding. 

Achieving Our Goals

TC and I continue to have just the best rides. It warmed up a bit this last week and even though TC got a little quiet in the heat, he still came out ready to work. Even if he insists on me dragging him into the arena each time. 

I set up my Pivo a couple of times because I'm really struggling to figure out what he looks like vs what he feels like. That's always been the case with him - he'll feel really connected and he's actually super short in the neck, or he'll feel off the bit but he's actually pleasantly in front of the vertical. 

The happy ears are the best part!

Still has a ridiculous tail

The first video I took led me to shorten the reins quite a bit in the second video and actually put the horse together. I think I mentioned it a little bit ago, I kind of forget how to ride right now. Between being super out of shape, kind of primed to think that anything he does is fine as long as it's not balking, and not having many lessons in the past six years, I'm a bit of a mess. 

But there was something about the second ride where I just... remembered what the actual hell I was supposed to do. 

I think it was the canter. I've always been a much better canter rider than trot rider and because his balking happened so much going into canter, I didn't get a lot of time riding the canter poorly, because we just weren't doing it. 

Because of that, when I put him into canter and he slowed a little, I bumped him with his leg and he went. And after that, I was like cool, I can put my mechanic into him then, and that's what we did. 

He seemed to be really happy about it! I think he's figuring out that he can actually canter again, and I'm sure that me putting my mechanic into him helped him find his balance and straightness a bit more. 

Excuse me? I had no idea what to do with this

This was more the balance we were in, which is
also great and more appropriate for his fitness level

The lateral work is a bit tough for us right now, I know we need to deal with that, but I've decided that it'll be Kate's problem. So rather than work too much at it, I decided to do something I was good at, which was to put him on quarterline in a bit of a shoulder-fore and do some walk to canter transitions.

He's quite crooked in canter like a lot of them are and this is one of the exercises that I think helped the most. He's pretty motivated to do a walk to canter for some reason (I think he thinks they are fun and very special) and will find his way into canter even if I'm blocking a lot of the directions he'd rather go. So all that is left over is to canter in a straight line. 

And damn, it worked so well! He really sat down and was able to strike off into a much better quality canter. 

I'm so impressed with him

Don't worry, I got a new phone so the screenshot
quality is about to get much better

The day after we did these canter transitions, I decided to do the same thing in the walk to trot transition, which was much harder for him. But he still tried SO hard at them and we got some really good moments of him picking up trot from a bit of a shoulder-fore!

I negotiated with him and let him school over some poles in between, so that kept him happy I think. He did keep trying to guess at what we were doing, so I had to keep telling him he was wrong, which he doesn't love. But he could take even thirty seconds to consider what I am asking him to do... 

I can actually half halt him now

He feels so good!

Again I'm so tickled that we have something real to work on!! 

I remember having a conversation with Kate about my goals with TC. Like I can't expect him to come back to work as if nothing happened, zip back up the levels, take him out at Fourth level and then move him to the PSG. He is fifteen years old this year and I'm also not really in a place where I can or even want to focus on climbing the levels again. 

I do love riding his canter

I came up with these goals:

1. I want to be able to ride him and actually work on things, not just fight with him about being forward

2. I want to keep him fit enough to feed more and go on trail rides/do fun things (like obstacle clinics)

3. I want him to look nice while I ride him so I can take video and not be like ew why does he look like that

And I think I have achieved all of those things! We'll see how things go through this summer because that's always a tough time for us. But I never would have thought that we'd get this far even during the time of year where things are easy for us. Onward and upward!

Back on the Trails

It has been quite some time since I took TC out on the trails at our local trail facility. Honestly I can't remember the last time I took him off the property for a trail ride. 

Happy ears!

I'm super lucky that we have a very convenient hillside to ride on at the ranch. I can do one loop in 25 minutes and two loops in 45 minutes and it's quite a bit of climbing. Because of that, I stopped needing to haul him out weekly for hill work to keep his stifle functional, but I still would take him out for longer rides and for fun. 

That is, until we went through everything we went through. I've tried to bring him back a few times, but the one facility that is my default trail facility has a lot of hills, and I've not been able to get him fit enough to feel like I can take him there and do the full loop that we do. Honestly, I've also not wanted to take the time to do it either, I really lost a lot of motivation to do much riding with all the issues we were having.

So much fun

On Sunday though, I decided it was time to start getting him used to hauling out and trail riding again. And it was so much fun! 

We got to the facility and there was some kind of fancy photoshoot happening with a girl in a beautiful dress and a friesian all dressed up with matching ribbons in his mane. TC unloaded and was surprisingly quiet, I thought he might think that we were there for a photoshoot with the way he was watching them. 

The mustard is kind of crazy

The bay area really can be beautiful

A little boy came over and seemed very interesting in petting TC. His grandmother asked if they could and I said yes, TC loves kids. And then the closer the kid was brought to TC, the more TC eyed him and the more the boy cried. Poor TC, denied a photoshoot and friendship. 

I tacked him up and hopped on and he was so so good immediately. Again, this is our normal trail facility and he's been ridden there since he was a baby. But it was a bit cold and windy and outside of the fancy friesian, we were the only horse there. We marched out to the gate on a loose rein and I very stupidly put on my instagram how chill he was. 

Love these trails

Because after that he started screaming and showing me all the stuff that was different since he'd gone there two years ago. Like yeah, they added a sign there, I'm sorry, I should have let them know not to change the place at ALL in the years since you have been here. 

But it was still a super pleasant ride, just like when he was a baby, if he was getting a bit unruly (and these days that's just whinnying and like, walking with a lot of huffiness), he gets pointed up a hill. 

I thought this was so funny

Happy boy (mostly)

I wasn't sure how much of the trail I actually wanted to do, I figured I'd see how he felt. He was going to have Monday off regardless and he's been doing both loops at home, plus some extra work on the tracks, adding up to about 75 minutes of light to moderate hill work. This was about 30 minutes more than that and a bit more climbing. 

He got a little over halfway still with enough lung capacity to scream and stare aggressively through the mustard at people, so I decided to do the whole loop. 

It's so gorgeous there

 

We got to the end of the ride with him feeling a bit tired, but still not so tired he didn't try to take me on a second loop. He got to meet two women who wanted to pet him and so I said yes and he got some attention. And he only had one minor spook at the end when two cyclists came bombing down the hill behind him and slammed on their brakes, skidding directly behind TC. 

He zipped forward about two strides before I turned around. The cyclists took that to mean they should race by us and he handled that just fine, but I called after them that like hey, you should probably ask the rider before doing that. Luckily he is the best boy and even without seeing a bike for actual years, he didn't care. 

Unsure of going back home

Tired boy after a trail ride

Finally I got him back to the trailer with a lot of protesting from him, he really didn't want to leave. When he got home, Rico was very happy to see him, and TC rolled, grazed a bit, and took a nap standing in his porch next to Rico. 

I was super pleased with the whole ordeal! He was stellar and best of all, we made it all the way around for the first time in YEARS. I'm so grateful to have this horse back. 

Relearning

After years and years of not really being able to ride my horse, I can suddenly ride my horse, and it's kind of a problem!

Not only am I unbelievably out of shape, I low key haven't really ridden seriously in years at this point. So much of my riding in the past few years has been focused on really basic things - can I get the horse to go forward, can I get the horse to go in what appears to be a straight line, and can I get the horse anywhere close to being on the bit. 

He just felt so complicated to ride, so a lot of our rides were breaking things down, keeping things simple, working on exercises that were like... transitions, figure-8s, serpentines. 

Loving my tracks!

Suddenly, with the saddle, everything became SO easy. He just went to the contact, he just went in a straight line, he just went in general (forward). Everything we'd been slowly working on for years became easy. And now I have no idea what to even do with him! 

Luckily the first day we tried the saddle, Kate had come out to teach me on him and also gave her student a bit of an intro lesson on him. Then I had her student take a lesson with Kate before we left for Ireland so that she could feel confident riding him while we were gone. And then I took a lesson with Kate last weekend. Kate to the rescue. 

Road walking is always fun

I'll probably go into more detail in another post about the specific exercises since we're still working on them, but she said a few things about TC that I wanted to talk more about since it's really more relevant than the actual exercises. 

Now that everything is so easy, what do we work on? Well, one of the first things that came up in both lessons is that TC is a very *flexible* horse without being a very *maneuverable* horse. Her student's horse is somewhat the opposite, and I've had a lot of those - a horse who you can put almost anywhere, but who struggles a bit with the suppleness. One of my old client's horses comes to mind, where he was kind of a ball of tension sometimes, I could put him into any movement I wanted, but he struggled to relax his back a bit. 

TC is a bit of a gloopy mess of a horse, but then you go to put your leg on to move him around and he's like oh... no thanks. And it's like, bro, you will contort your body to fling your shoulder right and your haunches left all day long... until I ask you to bring your haunches to the left, and then that's difficult? 

So we talked a lot about, how do we use lateral work to increase spinal stability rather than to destabilize him. It makes sense, he's already a little unstable, then I push him MORE unstable and he says look, let's not make things WORSE. 

My arena doesn't feel as small when
I can actually steer the horse

The other thing she said to her student about him that made me laugh was that TC likes to be right, but he hates to have to solve a problem. So his way of doing things is to just throw everything at you that he thinks you might want in rapid succession. Her student rode all sorts of weird stuff on him, including a lot of canter transitions (including counter canter from walk, so talented) before he finally was wrong enough to listen to her. 

I have a habit, especially these days, of accepting almost anything as long as it isn't balking or running sideways. So he's used to being right and not having to solve many problems right now. 

The big takeaway I snagged was that I need to balance this a little better and let him problem solve at his own pace, which is usually slower than I want. I think hustling him through things has made him skip the problem solving step and just guess. So I get to work on my impatience with him. 

I dunno if I've posted this weird bridle
yet but we got this too

It's been really great to have things to actually work on. I find myself more excited to ride now than I have in years. And it's fun to finally start seeing him put muscle on. Slowly but surely I am getting my horse back. We still have so far to go! And we are definitely in the time of year where things do start going better for us. I still think that we won't truly know until the end of summer how things are actually going for us. But things are going better right now than they have in years even during this time of year, and we've had some hot days. 

We have a fair amount in our arsenal left that we can do. We can inject his neck, his stifles, his SI. I can have Kate's student ride him more (to take me out of the equation since I'm more emotional about it all). I can give him more alfalfa or grain. We could switch barns. Lots of options! 

But I'm feeling really good about things. I don't need him to come back to Third level. I just want to work on things again, take lessons, go on trail rides, have fun again. And so far it seems like we're on the right track for doing that!